Monday, December 27, 2010

Earn My Degree

Attaining a degree will open up new career opportunities in the future. A good place to start is a website called EarnMyDegree.com in order to get more information on the subject. There are so many options, that anyone can find a college degree that will open doors to careers that are challenging and gratifying. Research shows that these career paths offer higher salaries than careers that don’t require a college degree. It’s worth looking into for anyone graduating from high school soon or anyone looking for a better career. It’s a very challenging time to look for a new career because of the state of the economy. One wise option to look into is to getting a college degree. They have a lot of valuable information on various college degree program available in your area or other parts of the country. Typically Online Colleges have lower cost than traditional colleges. What I liked best was I could choose my own study times. I would recommend old.mywritingblog.com, to any body that is looking for an online college as they can match you with the proper online college that fits your needs. So, check this out and get the information you need quick and easy.

A frog calls a psychic

Panda Recently, the Psychic Hotline and Psychic Friends Network have launched hotlines for frogs. Here is the story of one frog and his discussing with his psychic.

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?"

"No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Next day gourmet

My cousin, Billy, is a manager at a restaurant in California and has a lot of responsibilities that includes purchasing. There are many restaurant supplies they need on a daily, weekly and monthly basis. Billy said he only uses sources that are reliable and can give him the supplies when he needs it at competitive prices. One of his main sources is a website called superprod. They offer very competitive prices for great quality products. They have been in the business for years providing great customer service. Their selection includes refrigeration & ice, cooking & beverage, bar, dining room, kitchen & food prep, bakeware & cookware, catering & buffet and a lot more. This is the first place he goes when he orders supplies on a regular basis or when he needs something on the spur of the moment. Before he used this website, he used several different vendors to satisfy the demand his restaurant has for supplies. His bar manager also uses this website for all the bar equipment they need too. My hubby has a nephew that is graduating from cooking school in the spring and is a kitchen manager at an upscale Italian restaurant in Denver. Since he needs to buy supplies for his kitchen, I told him about this website that Billy uses as his main source for his supplies. After I checked out this site, I can see why anyone in the food service industry would be impressed with their huge selection and very competitive pricing. I remember talking to one of my friends, she's planning to buy some restaurant supplies and she's been asking me if I know a good place. I can't wait to tell her about what this website has to offer. So if you or someone you know is looking to buy bar equipment, check out this website and see their great selection to choose from.

Buried In The Holy Land

A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem.

While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land , for $150."

The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance".

Local

My hubby and I just made plans to visit his cousin, Steve, who lives in the Phoenix area. We will be there for a week and have plans to do a lot there during our visit. I have never been to that part of Arizona before and my hubby hasn’t been to Phoenix for almost twenty years. Steve just moved there a couple of months ago and is still getting used to his surroundings. He told us about a website called localdirectory that has been a big time saver for him. This internet directory is what he uses to find local businesses in his area or when he is driving around town on business. We told him about some of the things we want to do there and he suggested we visit this website to find what we needed. Steve said he used this website recently to find a list of Phoenix florists near him to buy a flower arrangement for the holidays. He emailed us a picture of the flowers he bought and they were absolutely gorgeous. He told us about some of the Phoenix theaters that are near him that have the latest releases. We try to watch movies when we get together with Steve, so he knew we would want to know which of the Phoenix movie theaters near him are the best ones. This website made it easy to find three Phoenix florists close to him so we will know where to go after we arrive. We found other places we wanted to go like some restaurants and fun places for Rachel to see to have fun. This place is very easy to use and will save us a lot of time during our vacation to Phoenix. So, check this out and see how they can help you.

Accountant's tatoo

Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, "Where in the hell have you been?"

Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo."

A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?" "I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.

"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"

"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.
Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want!"

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Whipping up some Christmas cookies

Guest post written by Jessica Barton

The part that I hate the most about the holidays is putting up all of our decorations. I've never been one for decorating because I'm not good at it at all, so that probably explains why. However, i do love baking things for the holidays and a lot of my friends know to expect some kind of baked good for Christmas. I'm so predictable about that now that people will even request certain things for their gifts that I've given them over the years!

So right now I'm working on planning what I'm going to bake for who. For the people that haven't requested specific baked goods, I've been using my Clear TV Bundle to find new recipes to cook for them.

I thought about fixing a new kind of Christmas cookie for those people, after baking it and trying it for myself, of course. I'm excited to see how those people think of these new recipes that I've found to see if I should add them to my regular roster of Christmas recipes.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Total Protecty Home Warranty

My hubby told me we need to do something to protect us and our home. He told me about a website called merchantcircle.com that has the perfect option for us. Their Total Protecty Home Warranty has the coverage we need. This coverage is so good my hubby said we should have signed up sooner. Anyone that was like us and didn’t have the coverage they need should visit this website to get the Total Protecty Home Warranty like we did. I can't wait to tell my friends about what this website has to offer. So, check this out and get the information you need quick and easy.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Two Spoons

At a restaurant, one of the customers noticed that all of the waiters had two spoons in their vest pocket. Upon being asked, the waiter said, "We see that the most frequently dropped silverware are spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement."

Then the customer noticed that a string was hanging out of all the waiters' flies and asked what the string was for. "The string is for us to go to the bathroom," explained the waiter, "that way, when we pull it, it shoots and aims right away. Then we don't have to stop to wash our hands."

The customer asked, "Well, that's how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?" The waiter whispered confidentially, "I don't know about the others, but I use the two spoons."

Friday, December 10, 2010

Payday loans

A good friend of mine, Lucy, said her husband finally got a job after being unemployed for almost a year. He was getting unemployment, but they still were falling behind on their bills each month. Over the last year, they have fallen behind on their credit card and medical bills. They are happy and relieved that Lucy’s husband has started working again, but they have bills due before he gets his first paycheck. She told me about their financial problem and explained to her we were in a similar situation not long ago. I suggested she visit a this great place to learn about the instant payday loans that we used to help us when we had cash flow problems. These payday loans no faxing is required to apply because the process is simple and quick. This is the perfect option for Lucy and her husband to use this loan to pay there bills to buy them time until her husband starts getting regular paychecks from his new employer. I have mentioned this website to several of my friends and they all were very impressed with how easy is is to apply and how quickly they got the cash they needed for their financial obligations. To learn more about payday loans online, check out this great site and see how they can help you.

The Cleaning Bill

Two Buddies were drinking in a bar one night and had became extremely drunk. One guy was so drunk that he had got sick all over his shirt. He looks at his buddy and says "My wife is gonna kill me when I get home,this is a brand new shirt! His buddy looks at him and says "don't worry,just put $20 in your front pocket and tell her that some guy got sick on you and gave you $20 for the cleaning bill. The guy thinks this is a excellent idea and continues to drink. He closes the bar down and heads home. When he arrives and opens the front door his wife is standing there waiting on him. "just look at you, you drunk bastard! You even got sick all over yourself". The man replies "No baby, it isn't like that some guy got sick on me and look here he gave me $20 for the cleaning bill. She pulls the money out of his pocket and counts it and says "Wait one minute there's $40 here! The guy looks at her and says " Oh yea, he shit in my pants too!

Nameplates

My friend has a business and needed to get some supplies for their office. She told me they were looking for quality custom labels and nameplates for some projects that have scheduled. I suggested she visit a website called datagraphicsinc.com to get what they need.

This website has these types of supplies and others items that are competitively priced and used by most businesses. They have been in the business for years providing great customer service. So if you or someone you know is looking to buy office supplies, check out this website and see their great selection to choose from.

Golden Saloon

A guy comes home completely drunk one night. He lurches through the door and is met by his scowling wife, who is most definitely not happy. "Where the hell have you been all night?" she demands.
"At this new bar," he says. "The Golden Saloon. Everything there is golden. It's got huge golden doors, a golden floor and even the urinal's gold!" The wife still doesn't believe his story, and the next day checks the phone book, finding a place across town called the Golden Saloon. She calls up the place to check her husband's story. "Is this the Golden Saloon?" she asks when the bartender answers the phone. "Yes it is," bartender answers. "Do you have huge golden doors?" "Sure do." "Do you have golden floors? "Most certainly do." "What about golden urinals?"There's a long pause, then the woman hears the bartender yelling,
"Hey, Duke, I think I got a lead on the guy that pissed in your
saxophone last night!"

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Payday loans

My brother, Glenn, has had some bad luck this year. He found out a couple of months ago that his company was going out of business and he along with his fellow co-workers were going to be laid off with very little notice. Since the company was out of cash, they didn’t pay their workers any severance at all. Glenn was very upset because he had worked there over five years and now was looking for another job. The job he had was something he really enjoyed and he got paid very well. Unfortunately, he wasn’t able to plan ahead for this and still is looking for a job. The unemployment he gets only pays a small part of the bills for his family. His wife found a part time job, but they are still falling short on paying their bills. Finally, last week Glenn got some great news and was given an offer for a very good job with a great company. He was so excited at first, but then realized that he was not going to be able to pay all of his bills before he started getting paid for his new job. I told him that we had the same problem when my hubby was out of work earlier this year, so we found a website called ivctricounty.org that was the solution for us. This is where we apply for payday loans when we are short on cash. They make it simple to apply and once we got approved, we got our cash very fast. Glenn was relieved that he could use these payday loans to help him with his bills. I was happy because my hard-working brother found a really good job and can use payday loans to pay his bills so he can get back on his feet financially much quicker.

Gently Put

Six guys are playing poker. After losing $500 on one hand, Smith clutches his chest and topples over, dead at the table. To decide who's going to tell his wife, his buddies draw straws. Anderson picks the short one. "Break it to her gently," they all urge.
"Leave it to me," he says. When Smith's wife comes to the door, Anderson says, "Your husband just lost $500 playing cards."
"How much?" the wife yells, eyes blazing. "Tell him to drop dead!"

Monday, December 6, 2010

Gift Baskets

My hubby always buys me flowers for special occasions and holidays. I like it because it reminds me how special he makes me feel when he buys me flowers. Also, fresh flowers always brighten up the room I put them in. I asked him recently where he buys the flowers for me since my friend wants to know. He said he uses a website called 1800baskets.com because this is where he gets to choose from a wide selection of Roses and other types of flowers. They also have a lot of great choices that would be perfect for many different occasions. It’s not easy to buy friends and relatives gifts for the holidays, so we often times buy Gift Baskets that we know they will enjoy. There is such a huge selection of them to choose from that it’s always easy to find one to order as a gift for someone we know. My hubby even buys them and takes them to his work as a reward for his employees after they have a good selling month. There are many different reasons, holidays or occasions where this website can help find the ideal gift for anyone we know. For parties, meetings, events, anniversaries, and personal gifts, nothing is more crowd-pleasing or easier to serve. In a generous range of sizes and contents, you’ll find the best in baskets. This website guarantee the quality, freshness, and presentation of their gifts. They offer very competitive prices for great quality products. They have been in the business for years providing great customer service. No matter what your budget, they can suggest a unique gift idea that will bring an expression of delight to the face of the recipient. Anyone looking to send flowers or gift baskets for the holidays should check out this website before they go anywhere else.

What's in a Name?

I was at a friends wedding. Her father asked me to dance with him. He was pretty drunk, but I figured what the hell. So we're dancing and I asked, "So, are you enjoying yourself Richard?" He said, "I prefer Dick." I said, "Well so do I, but what does that have to do with anything?"

Avon Calling

An Avon Lady was delivering products in a high-rise and was riding in the elevator. Suddenly, she had the powerful urge to fart. Since no one was in the elevator, she let it go - and it was a doozy.

Of course, the elevator then stopped at the next floor, so she quickly used some Avon Pine-Scented Spray to cover up the smell. A man entered the elevator and immediately made a face. "Holy cow! What's that smell?"

"I don't know, sir. I don't smell anything. What does it smell like to you?"

"Like someone crapped a Christmas tree."

Friday, December 3, 2010

The Best Action Movie

The Best Action Movie

The Author of this post is Cheryl Martinez

One of my favorite action movies of all time is Saving Private Ryan. It was actually one of the first war/action movies I've ever seen. I actually have watched this movie so much that my DVD can not even be read! Once in awhile, I'm able to catch my favorite action movie on DirecTV current offers to enjoy once again. The movie is really great and has some very memorable moments and characters throughout the hour and a half that is plays. My favorite character is the sniper known as Jackson. He's actually played by one of my favorite actors, so it was just a given.

The entire movie is based on a group of army soldiers who are sent out on a mission to find one soldier. Apparently, the soldier, who's name is Ryan, has been lost and is meant to go home. All three of his brothers were killed in combat, and as a last resort to save the family name, Ryan must be found and brought back home. The entire movie takes you through several different scenes of war and heart pounding action. At the end of the movie, Ryan is finally found in the midst of a huge battle with the German army. This movie is extremely well known, and I'm absolutely positive that I'm not the only one who loves it.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Payday Loans

A payday loan is a small, short-term loan that is intended to cover a borrower’s expenses until his or her next payday. In today’s volatile economy, more and more people are turning to payday loans for temporary financial assistance. Due to the prolonged recession we have been in for over two years, this website is a popular option for people that need a quick and reliable way to get help with their cash flow. A friend of mine suggested to visit a website called ivctricounty.org where they I can get an online payday loans for the cash flow I needed. I advised this online payday loans solution is our safety net for cash flow when we get in a financial bind and need some short-term help. I checked out the website and quickly realized this was our cash flow solution to help us with our financial situation. I didn't realize that there was a place we could go that would make it so easy to get payday loans when we are short on cash for our bills or other unexpected expenses. After we got our loan and paid our bills, I called my friend to thank her for the great suggestion she gave us. She said she tells all of her friends and relatives about it that need a simple and reliable cash flow source. My sister told me her husband started his new job last week, but won’t get his first paycheck for another two weeks. They were looking for a way to get some extra cash to pay their bills since he won’t get pair before their rent is due this week. They had to use their savings to make up the difference and that extra money for bills is gone after they paid their bills this month.

Arabic Ad

A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment. A friend asked, "Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?". The salesman explained, "When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I will makes a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters... First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand... Totally exhausted and panting. Second poster, the man is drinking our Cola and Third, our man is now totally refreshed. Then these posters were pasted all over the place". "That should have worked," said the friend. The salesman replied, "Well, not only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn't realize that Arabs Read from Right to Left..."